Showing Up Whole

When It All Happens At Once: Finding Meaning and Resilience in Life's Transitions

• Christina Fletcher • Season 4 • Episode 11

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Life's transitions can hit like a tidal wave, leaving us scrambling for something to hold onto.  However, with spiritual alignment as your focus, with a sense of duality within yourself, you can navigate the stormest waters.

In this week's episode Christina shares how the past few months have been tulmultous, between heartwrenching circumstances, to shifts in parenting dynamics, and ending with the passing of a family member, it has been a rollercoaster ride of highs and lows... and heartbreak.

However, when love triumphs over fear it offers a beacon in the storm.
Christina shares how by embracing the transformative energy of change, you can navigate life's challenges with the grace of a phoenix reborn.
Let's navigate the currents of change, leaning into the support of our spiritual compass, and fostering trust and acceptance to weather any storm.
So, join us for an uplifting conversation that promises to fortify your spirit and inspire resilience as we face life's inevitable transformations.

Want to learn more?
Follow me on Substack as well as at the links below! 
Let's create space for alignment in  day to day life!

Christina Fletcher is a Spiritual Alignment coach, energy worker, author, speaker and host of the podcast Showing Up Whole.
She specialises in practical spirituality and integrating inner work with outer living, so you can get self development off of the hobby shelf and integrated as a powerful fuel to your life.

Through mindset, spiritual connection, intuitive guidance, manifestation, and mindfulness techniques Christina helps her clients overcome overwhelm and shame to find a place of flow, ease, and deep heart-centered connection.
Christina has been a spiritual alignment coach, healer and spiritually aware parent coach for 7 years and trained in Therapeutic Touch 8 years ago. She is also a meditation teacher and speaker.
For more information please visit her website www.spirituallyawareliving.com

Want to uncover where you need the most energy alignment?
Take her new Energy Alignment Quiz to identify which of your energetic worlds (mind, body, heart or spirit) needs aligning the most!

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Speaker 1:

Hi and welcome back to Showing Up Whole the place where we discuss alignment in mind, body, heart and spirit in every aspect of our lives. Today we are going to be addressing the seem to be global experience of everything happening all at once. There seems to be this general sense where right now everyone's just feeling a little bit drowned out by all the different aspects of life. So let's just look at that and share some insight. Hi and welcome back. You know I had all the best intentions in the world to keep steady going on these episodes and, as you well know if you're a regular listener, that has been a challenge this year. It's a fascinating thing when life kind of goes a bit barreling down a cascading waterfall. I will say that over the last six weeks I've had a daughter get into university for September, so she'll be moving out into London. I have another daughter in a serious relationship who also has a new job and learned how to drive. My mother broke her hip back in Canada and then I had a sister come out and visit and my nephew, which was lovely, and then suddenly last week this all kind of accumulated to our dog passing and it's been a bit of a roller coaster. It's rather phenomenal watching the human heart encompass all of these emotions all at once, dream and achieve her ideal outcome of getting into university, and yet knowing the bittersweetness of her moving on to something else, to also then having family visit and experiencing the rush and joy of seeing people, but then accumulating all of that into the passing of a family member, to the passing of a family member. What do we experience in these rushes? What I find unbelievable is how, even while I was going on these ups and downs and rollercoaster twists, I spoke to a number of people who were saying why does everything happen at once? It was like my inbox became full of people saying Christina, I have been hit from every direction, some of it good, some of it not, and I don't quite know what this is. So here we stand. I think it's a good thing to approach. What is it when everything hits at once and what's the way to connect within that? How do you plug into spirit and find your deepest wholeness when everything is shaking you down to your core?

Speaker 1:

The important thing to remember is that life is ever evolving. Nothing stays the same, nothing is static. We come here into this life and we are born into these bodies and yet these bodies are continually changing. When you think of yourself as a small child, you think of yourself in that space of continual change. You know, if you remind yourself of when you were a child and you looked into the mirror, you would see a different reflection, almost on a weekly occurrence. You would also gain new skills and you would start to fear the risk of letting go of what you knew in order to know something different.

Speaker 1:

I was thinking the other day about as a child, I used to have all my imaginary friends and I loved playing with my dolls and I loved playing various imaginary games. And I remember, occasionally, as I grew, the fearful thought of when will I stop having fun doing this? And I remember the fear of having to let go of the things that gave me joy, of having to let go of the things that gave me joy. And then, of course, it happened. And the funny thing is that as you grow, those things happen in a natural progression. Something else takes your interest, something else makes you filled with joy, something else. You grow into new perceptions and you release the things that were into new perceptions and you release the things that were.

Speaker 1:

You've heard me say often enough that life works through chapters and it's important to acknowledge your chapters and to celebrate them and to appreciate them when you're in them. And yet then there comes a time, like right now, when suddenly it feels like all chapters are changing or potentially closing, and you stand at the threshold where, not quite knowing what is on the next level. It's fascinating, isn't it? Because as children I mean, we grow at what like a six-month state. You know, especially in our generations, it seemed like time spread out, christmases seemed so far away from each other. And yet, you know, you dealt with those gradual growing years from one chapter to the next chapter, to the next chapter, and it all seemed to just build steadily upon each other. And then you hit another stage when suddenly the spaces between chapters seem to stretch. We've been parents, my husband and I, for 21, 22 years, and in those 22 years we've created a system, we've created a rhythm which is now going to change as our children start to leave, and we're very lucky to have had that period of time with our kids. At the same time, our rhythms will have to change, and a 22-year stretch is quite the stretch, and within that stretch there's been little chapters, there's been rhythm changes. But things like wondering who's being called in for dinner is the same type of thing. Wondering who's being called in for dinner is the same type of thing. Twelve years to have a dog to be aware of those rhythms, to be aware of you know, knowing he needed to go out for a walk, knowing when he needed to be fed, coming into the room and knowing he knew it was time for his nightly treat those were all rhythms.

Speaker 1:

So what happens when everything happens at once? It's really important to acknowledge two things. Those two things are your human perspective and human experience and your spiritual perspective and spiritual experience. Spirit is ever-moving, ever-flowing. It wants to experience the new. It acknowledges that everything is crumbling at once or everything is changing at once and it goes okay, now what? And then you have the human perspective, and the human perspective is made up of your neural pathways, your mental stories, your emotional journeys and the attachment that we give to the story of what is-ness. And as we let things go, suddenly the story turns to what won't be again.

Speaker 1:

And I want you to know that both of these experiences are equally valuable. You know, so often in the spiritual experience and spiritual development world, there comes to be this tug of war of saying release the human experience. And I want you to know that that's not necessary. You have all eternity to be spiritual and you have this moment to be human. So it's really vitally important to live in a state of duality within this. What do I mean by that? Well, let's take this last week.

Speaker 1:

So, and also I want to encourage you, I will drop a link to my new sub stack in the show notes, because I did actually just do a deep dive of walking the path of grief in my new sub stack. They're called the Mystical Musings and they are a bit of a deep dive into the fundamentals of spiritually awareness and making sure that you have those fundamental foundational blocks in place. And I did just write an article all about our dog's passing and how that did launch into the walk in the path of grief and the juggling between human experience and spiritual awareness. So by all means, check out that link and come over and subscribe, because I'm really loving Substack.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, all of that to say, let's look at how we take an experience like grief to find that balance between the dual perspectives, have the practiced belief that spirit is eternal and that when his spirit left his body it would be around. So, therefore, because I have that practiced belief, which is now a knowing, because it's practiced so long, then I was able to acknowledge that, even as I was shedding my tears, my human self had the emotional upheaval, the heartache, the feeling of the void. My neural pathways, my lovely physical world pathways, my lovely physical world right, my physical nervous system immediately felt the shock of him not being around. It was like your brain loves patterns, your nervous system loves patterns, it loves routine, it loves systems, and as soon as something is removed, your brain can and your nervous system can go into a frenzy because suddenly nothing feels safe and the simple act of not going for your walk the next morning, the same way you usually would, can be incredibly startling and bombarding for your nervous system. So it is a question of acknowledging. Well, this is what the stories that are in my head, these are what my heart is processing and attempting to find balance with and this is where my nervous system is. You know, your four worlds of alignment are well in play here and those are the three that really focus on the human experience. So the human experience is made up of your physical, your mental and your emotional worlds, and all of those are banging around in total confusion when something needs to be let go and when you're shifting to a new space.

Speaker 1:

It's a powerful time, and the way things have been just isn't working anymore. If you've been feeling disjointed, overwhelmed or scattered, you're not alone. Many are feeling that there's a feeling of needing more. Something's missing. What this feeling tells you is that it's time to claim your inner self and step away from the stories you've been taught to follow. It's time to listen to your heart, to heal your hurts and learn to lean into the universe. Having your back. It's time to take all of that self-help book knowledge and embody it, assimilate it and make it your own.

Speaker 1:

I'm Christina Fletcher and as a spiritual alignment coach at Energy Healer, I can help you take spirituality off of the hobby shelf and into your everyday, sometimes messy, life so you can truly show up whole. Through coaching courses, books and more, I make sure you have practical tools to support you through these challenging times. To learn more, check out my website spirituallyawarelivingcom, where you'll find information on how I work, as well as a free guide to releasing the beliefs that have been holding you back. I look forward to connecting with you, love and light.

Speaker 1:

It was the same when we got happy news about, say, our daughter getting into university. Suddenly it was my mind would start chattering. Nothing's going to be the same. Oh, my goodness, you know everything's changing. My heart swelled with so much pride because, as a homeschooler, I can tell you, nothing is as satisfying as when your homeschooler daughter, who really, really, really, really loved her schoolwork and had great ambition, suddenly gets that acceptance letter. It is the golden prize. I will tell you when, all of a sudden, you go okay, it worked. That joy was heart-swelling and so expansive. That joy was heart-swelling and so expansive. And then, like an inflated balloon, it sort of starts to crash down upon you when you realize, oh, she's leaving.

Speaker 1:

So the heart is in this flux and all you can do is witness it. And you witness the stories and you witness your nervous system and you witness your human experience. So you have the human experience and that witnessing is a question of acknowledgement and deep compassion. You don't need to know all the answers right away and you don't need to hide what you're feeling. You don't need to be happy all the time and you don't need to only be focusing on the positive when changes are erupting around you, and that if there's anything I want you to hear, it's that you know, we so often talk about spirituality and positive focus and we, you know it's like oh, don't think any negative thoughts. Your heart is processing things and you are allowed to grieve for what's changing. Your mind is telling stories of what's been and what might not be again, and that's okay. Your nervous system may feel triggered and may feel unsafe and may feel frantic, and all of these things need to be acknowledged so then they can be dealt with. But you have four worlds of yourself and that's only three.

Speaker 1:

So you have your spiritual world, and that is the one of expansion and that's the one that understands the eternalness of it all, and that is the one of expansion and that's the one that understands the eternalness of it all and that is the one that resonates with love. You know, it's funny because two things on this, actually, when our dog passed, it's a fascinating thing because my family and I we talked about how, yes, we could feel him around at certain times, but never when we were in the throes of grief. It was like when we're walking to the dishwasher and all of a sudden you just feel him around. It was times when you weren't in deep sadness, because the deep sad parts is when you are in your human state and you're not a vibrational match to the frequency of the moreness of someone else. You have to be resonating in your spiritual world, you have to be aligned in your spiritual world. You have to be aligned to love and open to receiving the new in order to develop the new relationship. That's adjusting. And also it's an interesting thing because when you're walking in the path of grief, I always describe grief as a tunnel because it can get so dark as you walk down that path. It's a path of faith because it's almost like your spiritual energy knows. Well, this has been adjusted. Things are over here and your spirit's already over there in the field of unknowing, and you can't find that yet. So, yeah, there are times in grief when you actually can't connect to your spiritual energy and you can't actually align. You just keep treading the boards, you just keep walking, you carry the water and chop the wood, as they say.

Speaker 1:

So what are my suggestions for the alignment to be found, with everything falling apart? Well, let's kind of look at that in a couple of steps. First of all, you acknowledge the duality of the experience. If everything is swirling and you feel totally triggered and you notice that everything is happening all at once and you just feel like you're in a snowstorm and or a tornado and you can't find ground, then acknowledge the situation, acknowledge that you feel overwhelmed. Acknowledge that you feel overwhelmed. Acknowledge that you feel in the throes of grief or sadness or upset or frustration. Acknowledge also the things that bring you joy and things that bring you pride or the things that bring you a sense of lightness and flow. Acknowledge it all and just give a little bit of a nod to your human experience and then take a very, very, very, very, very deep breath, focus on your feet and ground and and invite in love, invite in your spiritual essence and your spiritual connection and your spiritual source of whatever that may be for you. Allow it to wash away the fear. You know it's spiritual alignment.

Speaker 1:

When you're talking about your spiritual energy, it's kind of an off and on switch. It's an off and on switch of your sense of when you are on. It is a question of being fully plugged in and connecting to all that isness. It is knowing that the universe does have your back, that you can let go and let God, as they say, and it can flow. And even if things are bumpy, you are being carried down the cascading waterfall, even in a barrel. Then, if it's an off switch, when you've turned that off, it's kind of like turning off a tap. It just feels like a void and you are the one that has to turn on the tap. So take a deep breath, turn on the tap, focus on your feet and simply whisper to yourself I let in love, I want to talk to divine. I mutter to it all the time. So it's okay to be like yeah, I could do with some help. Yeah, this seems like a little bit of a lot right now. What's going on?

Speaker 1:

Allow yourself to be open to the discussion with your own sense of source. Let it in, let it in. Let it in, let it in, because when you do, when you can find the space of deeper connection, when you know that it is such a wider view, when you know that we are all just players on a stage and there is such a deeper version of ourselves kind of laughing at the chaos or understanding things from a far bigger view when you know that there's a higher version of yourself, your angel being that's looking at the chaos, going wow, they're going to really appreciate the shifts and stages that are happening here. And give them 10 years and it's all going to make sense when you know that. You look back at your life so far and again, just like when you were a child, those chapters moved effortlessly and you found that you'd forgotten the fear of what was. When you do that and you just release to the flow of life and you trust in the well-being of all, I am not saying that you might not still burst into tears for the loss of a pet, and I will not say that you won't still get a little teary-eyed when you know that a daughter's leaving home. And I won't say that you won't still bump up against worries about your family or you won't be wondering about the nature of it all.

Speaker 1:

The core line underneath all of it, the foundational golden thread that runs through and seems to weave through, gathering up all of the fragments of your life, is love and not the fear of what you're losing out on. Instead, it is done with the concept and understanding of loving well-being. It's not always easy and you will have human moments, but acknowledge it as a human moment and love yourself through it. Don't push it away, don't say, oh, we don't have those. Of course you have those. You're a human, so you have the human moment and you let it pass, and you let it the glorious expansion.

Speaker 1:

What's next? What's coming? What do you need to do to align to the up-level that's around the corner? Because if everything is crashing out around you, there's an up-level around the corner. The phoenix is rising. Everything just needs to burn to the ground first. So ground, love yourself through the human experiences, because that's what you're here for. Tap into source and allow spirit and love to flow and then find any way, whenever you're ready, to lean into the frequency and the energy of what's to come, because it can be beautiful, breathe it all in and let it flow again. Uh, check out the show notes and come over and check things over at substack and let me know if you need anything, because the world it is a changing and it is growing and it is expanding and in all of it is my absolute joy to support you in any way that I can. So pop over to the Facebook group, where we are doing a few changes and shifts and email me at any time you need to. In love and light. Bye now.